So, Tim, Harry, and I were talking about diarrhea at the
dinner table the other night. I don’t
why. Tim and I were playing Bananagrams at the time, the usual world cup kind
of game where we’re deciding who is actually smarter. (I think the record shows that I am the
smartest, but I can’t remember all that has gone before, so I’ll just say that
at the moment we’re neck and neck.)
Anyway, the word, and hence the subject, diarrhea, came up
and Tim said that there’s an alternate spelling of the word that's far worse
than "diarrhea". I didn’t believe him.
“ No, there’s a spelling that will make you go 'Ick!'. It’s a different one. I think it ends 'rrheo', or something like
that.”
“You mean, ‘rrhea’. That’s how it’s spelled.”
“‘rrheo’ – or something like that.”
“I think you mean, 'rrhea'.
That’s how it’s spelled,“ I said doggedly.
“No, it’s something different.”
“I don’t believe you.”
And this went on for a while, until Harry said “Let’s look
it up!” (This is something we do almost
every night.)
So, we did. And let me tell you, Tim was right. There is an alternate spelling and it IS different
and much more visual.
DIARRHOEA
I completely spazzed out at that point: “Diarrhoea! Oh my God, that’s horrible!”
“I know, right?”
We kept saying the word over and over again, heaving at the
“hoea” part of it. Diarrhoea, diarrhoea,
diarrhooooeea Sputter, gag, heave.
“It’s awful, isn’t
it”, Tim said, reveling in being right for a change and gagging at the same
time.
“Totally. It’s
explosive. It’s like KRAKATOA!”
So let me say that words do matter. They WILL hurt you. I’d much rather have diarrhea than
diarrhoea. Tim gets an extra bananagram
point for that one.
